Navigation: Index >> Previous >> Next

A young Christian asked, "What can I do to make Christians love me?" While a wonderful question, it is the wrong end of the matter. The Bible does not tell us to try and make Christians love us, but repeatedly it does tell us that we should love Christians. This is what we should be working on, not being concerned about whether Christians love us. An old and experienced servant of God exhorted a young Christian: "I cannot give you a definite Scripture, but I believe I can give you good advice—to be loved, be lovely."

Emphasize “you” instead of “me”

Probably most of us can think of a Christian somewhere who is not well liked. The reason may be because of putting too much emphasis on “me” rather than “you.” Our nature is to desire honor, esteem, and love, but many of us have the wrong idea on how to obtain it—boasting of self, striving to be boss while belittling others. While such are busy trying to push themselves up, others are equally busy pushing them down, and they are held in low esteem. In order to be loved, strive to forget the “I” and emphasize the “you.” Compliment others on every good thing they may do, and be extremely cautious of criticism. No one likes a chronic fault finder. Some people, even Christians, can find fault with almost everything said or done by anybody. There is a lot of difference between being a leader and boss. People will follow one, but despise and even hate the other. Try to lead, not drive. To be loved seek honestly to love others as you love yourself.

Love the first lesson

The first lesson the Lord desires to teach a new convert is love. The first "fruit of the Spirit is love" (Gal. 5:22)—love toward the Lord, then toward the people of God, and also love for the lost sinner. We are not to love the sinner's ways, but the sinner for Christ's sake, that a soul may be saved. How quickly some learn this lesson of love. The moment they obey the Gospel of Christ¹, their hearts go out to the Lord's people. The Philippian jailor was evidently a hard man who thought nothing of putting Paul and Silas into the innermost prison, making their feet fast in the stocks. But when he obeyed the Gospel of Christ he became a kind, loving, considerate saint. He took the Lord's servants out of the prison and into his house, washing their stripes and feeding them.

 Scripture Reading : 1 Thessalonians 4:9

But concerning brotherly love you have no need that I should write to you, for you yourselves are taught by God to love one another.

The Thessalonians were taught of God to love

The Thessalonians were quick to learn this important lesson of love. Paul says it was not necessary for him to write them concerning this, since they had already been taught it by God Himself; He had spoken to their hearts. Notice the way Paul commends them for this love. Note that continually, whenever there was anything worthy of praise in anyone, Paul is not afraid to express it. This is a lesson everyone of us need to learn. We are often quick to condemn for failure, but slow to commend for that which is worth while. By God's grace let us seek to be the reverse—slow to criticize, but swift to commend. This is a great point in getting along with other Christians. Let us all check up on ourselves immediately. Are we failing in this point? If so, let us determine to be different. True love is slow to criticize, quick to commend.

God, a great teacher

Were the apostle here today could he truly say of us, “You yourselves are taught by God to love one another”? Hopefully he could, but if not, ask God at once to teach you to do this. He is a great teacher. Far too often, it seems that we seek to learn from man instead of directly from the Lord, through His Word. Today, too few of us read the Word of God for ourselves and too few ask the Lord for personal instruction. If we did then we would be sure to live a life more like our Lord Jesus. He would teach us many things and certainly He would teach us to love His people. "But the anointing which you have received from Him abides in you, and you do not need that anyone teach you" (1 John 2:27; see also John 6:44, 45 and John 14:26). Whatever good we may do, let us not take the credit ourselves but let us give God all the glory, because either directly or indirectly, it is He who taught us to do it.

To love one another

The unsaved world in the time of Paul was filled with sin and selfishness. Chapter 1 of Romans pictures their awful sin. It is a well-known fact that the unsaved had no sympathy and made no provision for the poor, the sick, and the aged. The moment Christianity entered a community there was a marked change. The Christians were noted for their purity, but especially for the strong brotherly love manifest among them. The poor people of Europe and Asia-Minor looked with amazement, joy, and hope at these people who were so knit together in the bonds of Christian love and fellowship. This was Christianity's greatest recommendation and men were irresistibly drawn to it by a desire to share this life of love. In A.D. 192 Tertullian wrote, "The heathen often exclaimed in wonder, 'See how these Christians love each other."' Unsaved Lucian wrote about the same time, "It is incredible to see the fervor with which the people of that religion help each other in their wants. They spare nothing. Their first legislator (Jesus Christ) has put it into their heads that they are all brethren."

Real spirit of love

Some today who profess Christianity are hard and formal, manifesting little of this life of love. As we read the book of Thessalonians, we cannot help but know that the Christians of this city were like one large happy family, tenderly loving one another. They surely loved the apostle Paul, too, and he had a large place in his heart for them. "Behold, how good and how pleasant it is For brethren to dwell together in unity!" "For there the Lord commanded the blessing—life forevermore" (Ps. 133:1, 3).

Footnote:

¹ For more information on salvation, see God’s Salvation in A Religion Library section of StudyJesus.com.